Shiloh Grimball Essays - Indian Religions, Philosophy Of Love

Shiloh Grimball English 101 Mrs. Esch September 26, 2016 Arranged Marriage An Essay on a Theme in a Non-fiction Work Arranged marriages date back before the 18th century, as the most common way of marriage throughout the world. Arranged marriages are a type of marital union where the groom and bride are selected by their respective families. In this type of marriage, parents know best. The parents of the bride or groom search for their child's perfect match. There are many factors in finding the perfect match for their child, such as the reputation of the family, wealth, appearance, values he/she possesses, caste or religion, horoscope, and health of the partner. While american culture would argue that arranged marriage isn't the best method, people worldwide agree it is the best way of marriage. With an arranged marriage, individuals don't have to waste time dating looking for the right spouse, couples become closer and build trust within their family, and their love grows throughout the marriage; these factors builds perfect marriages. Parents play an important role in arranged marriages. They are the ones who look for the "perfect match" of their kids. This parental factor bring the families closer and builds trust within them. In the essay "Arranging a Marriage in India," by Serena Nanda, Nanda talks about her trips to India and her discoveries in the arranged marriage custom there. One of the many people Nanda meets is a girl name Sita. Sita has been waiting a little over a year for her parents to find her a husband. Nanda and Sita has a conversation about arranged marriage. Nanda asks her, "How can you go along with this? Don't you care who you marry?" Sista responds, "Of course I care. This is why I must let my parents choose a boy for me. My marriage is too important to be arranged by such an inexperienced person as myself. In such matters, it is better to have my parents' guidance."(548) Nanda explains how the "young men and women in India do not date and have very little social life involving members of the opposite sex."(548) This conversation between the author and Sita has pin points the main role the parents play in arranged marriage. Their conversation ties into another reason arranged marriage is the right marital path to take. In India dating rarely happens: the "young men and women in India do not date and have very little social life involving members of the opposite sex." To continue their conversation, Nanda asked Sita, "But how can you marry the first man you have ever met? Not only have you missed the fun of meeting a lot of different people, but you have not given yourself the chance to know who is the right man for you." Sita responds, "Meeting with a lot of different people doesn't sound like any fun at all. One hears that in America the girls are spending more time worrying about whether they will meet a man and get married. Here we have the chance to enjoy our life and let our parents do this work and worrying for us."(549) Sita remarks seem surprisingly accurate in today's America. Girls in american culture stress and worry themselves about if they'll find their soulmate or forever spouse. They stress so much about it that they do so much to get a man's attention. Girls wear a lot of makeup, tighter clothes , and they change their physical appearance by getting plastic surgery. How Nanda phrases it is, "The high anxiety of the competition to "be popular" with the opposite sex certainly was the most prominent feature of life an an American teenager in the late fifties. The endless worrying about the rules that governed our behavior and about our popularity ratings sapped both our self-esteem and our enjoyment of adolescence." Nanda is still not convinced about the whole idea of marrying a random person, so she ask Sita, "How can you marry someone you don't know personally and don't love? How can you think of spending your life with someone you may not even like?" The answer Sita gives to answer her question proves how arranged marriage is the best way